Of pirates and sea monsters

During this past weekend I was working at the “Breakfast with the Pirates” event. While wandering from table to table causing trouble, a shy young girl asked me “how come pirates fight sea monsters?!” As she said it, she had a very somber and sad look on her face, I took it to mean that she felt sorry for the poor sea monsters. (thank you water horse, no doubt…)
oh boy…
“ahh the old sea monster question…”, I stalled

quick John think!

“Well lass, ya see… sea monsters, through no fault of their own, have a real taste for ships… no one really knows why, they just like to munch on them, kinda like you like pancakes… they must just taste good… Well pirates, we like our ships too, not fer eatin of course, we preferr pancakes, and we would rather not have our ships eaten by sea monsters. ya know what happens when our ships get eaten by sea monsters? we have to float all the way back to shore, and that takes a very very very long time ya see, and really isn’t that much fun… I got me oar right her so i can paddle back faster ya see… so anyway… we pirates have to hunt after the sea monsters and k… aarr scold them regularly to make sure they all know it’s not right ta be eating all the ships… (i said scold, not kill… please no crying kid… i didn’t hurt the water horse) that goes for the cruise ships too… see if we didn’t hunt down the sea monsters and scold them, then they might eat the cruise ships too… and all those poor people would have to float back to shore too… so that’s why we pirates have ta hunt sea monsters”
At this the mom jumped in smiling and confirmed my story with her daughter, “see hunny, they are all protecting the people on the ships by hunting down the sea monsters. That way mommies and daddies and families on ships are all safe to enjoy vacations” with the external confirmation the daughter smiled and she seemed much happier about the whole situation and later she even smiled and waved when I came back by their table.

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